Purify Your Bride

Marriage can be that way. You want to grow deeper but it seems hard. It seems like you might mess things up. Besides, things are pretty good right now, aren’t they? A lawyer friend of mine used to tell me how many men didn’t know they had a marriage problem until the divorce papers arrived. They just thought everything was OK so they really didn’t work on their marriage. Then it was too late.

I wonder if we can do that in our spiritual life. If we think we are OK with God. We are sure out theology is spot on or at least close. We know we are saved when we die. So we don’t worry about hell. We don’t worry about purgatory since we are sure that does not exist. So everything is fine. Or is it? Maybe you are like the guy who thinks his marriage is fine.

Jesus talked over and over again about people who thought they were OK with God and warned that many were sadly mistaken. Yes, our pastor tells us he is not talking about folks like us. But what if he is wrong? What if he was talking about folks who are in a spiritual rut and are a lot further from God than they ever imagined?

The answer is the same as the marriage answer. You should never stop working at improving your marriage. You should not refuse to deal with things because the status quo seems OK and you don’t want to stir the pot. First of all, because it might not be OK. Secondly because we can and should get holier as time goes on. We need to trust in our spouse’s love and trust in God’s love so we can be fearlessly honest. We don’t have to bury our talents in the ground, or even our weaknesses for that matter. We can get over that initial discomfort because we know we are loved and accepted unconditionally.

I do think suggesting that people do a huge rethink of their religious positions runs into this all the time. Certainly when you ask people to consider becoming Christians. But also when you ask people to reconsider central doctrines like Sola Scriptura. It comes back to Fr Barron’s point about understanding why people don’t listen. People are afraid of shaking up their lives. They are afraid they might end up worse off than where they were before.

It strikes me that most of the answers to this spiritual problem have been discarded by protestantism. I already touched on how “one saved always saved” and the denial of purgatory can cause you to be OK with what you know to be mediocre holiness. So what if I have the wrong answer on contraception? I still go to heaven so it does not matter.

There is also the absence of saints. This works in two ways. You don’t use saints as models. They tend to show us very clearly how to pursue holiness without compromise. But the other side is that you don’t want to be a saint. The concept does not register. That after you die the fact that you are in heaven and not in purgatory might enable you to intercede powerfully for those still on earth.

The other thing that allows us as Catholics to pursue holiness fearlessly is of course the church itself. When you are on the rock then you don’t have to fear slipping under. As long as you are not leaving that solid foundation you can ask any question and reach for any goal. When you are not on the rock but on a piece of driftwood then you will hold on tight. You might think you see something better but you had better be sure you can get there. Otherwise you might be sunk.